What is an OmaHeck...

It is likely you have never heard of an OmaHeck. We kind of made it up. Here's a little history:

When I moved to Utah in 1990, I was introduced to a brand new phrase: "Oh my heck!" I guess it means "wow", "no way", or "that's surprising." It serves as a multi-purpose expression and possibly a swear :-0 (as in "Oh my heck, you are a jerk!)

When the family left Utah and settled in Omaha, NE (2004), we became "OmaHecks."
Showing posts with label kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kids. Show all posts

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Crab Walk

Not sure how this will play out on the blog... but go with me for a while.

Today we had the JDRF Rufus Breakfast. It's a great fair with food, fun, and a fair that highlights some of the new technology and such that impact diabetics. It was cool.

The amazing motocross team from Type1Racing set up some games and activities for the kids.

At one point, the instructions were to "crab walk" between two points. You know, the crab walk... on your hands and feet, belly to the sky. I say to Tate, "You know the crab walk, right?"

He smiles at me, says, "Sure, Dad!" and takes off walking sideways with his hands above his shoulders doing a pincer pantomime. It was hilarious!

Mama Grizzly Has Nothing. Nothing!

The other day, Tate was reading in the "parlor" while Cyndie was doing a few chores in the bedrooms.

He lured her down with the promise of a very important question.

When she arrived, he said, "Can I ask you a question?"

Since that was the whole reason she'd come down stairs, she, of course agreed.

"Mom, if you saw someone being cruel to me, would you do what any mother would do? And build a demonic robot to destroy them?"

Saturday, January 14, 2012

The Endorsement

Dane has decided to make it official. While weighing the virtues of political neutrality up to this point, he's taken the gloves off now.

He's throwing his full support behind the man he thinks can really change the country: Stephen Colbert!

Here's the ringing endorsement:

"I think he'd make a nice president... He's got a wife, he's got kids... even though he cusses a lot."

In a statement, Mr. Colbert thanked Dane for his willingness to take a stand and for his unfailing patriotism. "Personally, I think that's the best endorsement any candidate could hope for: a full disclosure of my warts, with an acknowledgement that they aren't the entirety of what I have to offer, that there are virtues deeper than the surface."

D.A.R.E. To Say It Like It Is

Dane recently completed the D.A.R.E program at school. It's a national substance abuse prevention program. As part of the requirements, Dane had to write a report about resisting drug use.

Something you may not know about Dane, he watches the Today Show on NBC every day while getting ready for school. He's become kind of a news junkie. He knows a ton about what's going on in the world. He also watches Stossel and The Colbert Report.

You may remember that Dane (then age 7) posited that Barack Obama became President because he stopped smoking, which it turns out is not the case, incidentally. With all the GOP primaries on the news Dane reminded us that President Obama was elected by the people (Dane's leaning toward an endorsement of Stephen Colbert as the South Carolina Primary approaches) and Michelle Obama says PBO didn't stop smoking until early 2010.

With that background, I give you Dane's D.A.R.E. Report (unedited):

Some people think drugs, alcohol and smoking is fun, like Obama did. But, he eventually quit smoking. Drugs are not playthings, but people still use them illegaly. Did you know that in thirty days twenty percent of eighth-grade students drink alcohol? To much drinking can cause death. Smoking can turn your lungs black. Don't be a fool, smoking isn't cool. So don't get involved i alcohol, drugs, violence and crime. Dare to resist. Don't smoke, drink, or take drugs. All of these will do this --> (hand drawn)I, Dane Anderson swear to stay drug free.
Thanks, Dane. We have no further comment.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Zero Hour! Hawaiian Vacation

On the way home from Rock Climbing club tonight, I was treated to the following:

And you're Zero whistling Aloha Oe while you discover that it's hard to do the Hula with no arms or legs, so you just put fresh fruit on your head and continue dancing.

Because apparently while the Hula requires limbs, they are optional for putting fresh fruit on your head.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Zero Hour!

I've been on a social media fast. I decided the last week of June that July would be a cold-turkey, go-off-it-all month. I'll post more on that later.

Interestingly enough, Tate took a bit of a hiatus in his Zero game that you didn't miss much while I abstained from blogging. He's conveniently re-started the game, with an intensified complexity!


...and you're Zero in 1937 in the third pilot seat with Fred Noonan and Amelia Erhart, not paying attention to the coming storm.

...and I'm holding the just-been-born puppy Zero and all of the adult ghost dogs are amazed because he's the first baby ghost puppy ever.

...Zero, the ghost puppy, presents "Ghost Puppy Tunes 2"! Including Zero, singing "Smoke On The Water".

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Of Father's Day and My Sons

I was asked to speak in Church today, Father's Day. Having congregants deliver sermons is routine in the Mormon Church. But this was no routine assignment: I was to deliver a message on the blessings and joys of being the Father of a child with a disability. God sent His Spirit to lift and comfort me and I was blessed to deliver it (mostly) in control of my emotions. I thought I'd share what I said. Here's the text of my talk:

I know that for many of you, being in my place today would be nerve wracking. But, I am really not bothered by speaking in Church. It's a place of love and acceptance. Plus, I've been asked to teach true principles, and I have a testimony of the restored Gospel, which makes my assignment easier. I frequently speak at work, and the environment‟s not so nurturing. Poor performance can even damage my career. I figure the worst that can happen today is that my message will be so off track that Bishop Rowley will decide to release me from my calling… but none of you get any ideas…

Actually, when Brother Hill called me and invited me to speak today, my biggest concern was that he only gave me 10-12 minutes! I have been the third speaker on a three speaker program when I prepared 15 minutes and had 30 minutes left; and prepared 20 minutes and had 5. I’ll do my best to stick to the 10 minute goal.

The topic I've been assigned is the challenges and blessings of being the Father of a child with disabilities. After accepting this opportunity, Cyndie's first question was “Are you going to get through that?” My first comment to Cyndie was “How do I make this a positive talk?” Allow me to make an analogy with a mission: Dealing with a disability can be monotonous, with very challenging routines. Knowing the challenges you will face, you often look for ways to circumvent them. When stacked next to each other by quantity, the positive seem to be outweighed almost infinitely. However, when compared in magnitude, each positive experience can nearly eliminate the feelings of hardship endured to get there. I was inspired in preparing this talk as I researched the topic and have found a great and humbling message to share with you.

For those who don't know, my sons both have developmental disorders on the autism spectrum. Tate is considered high-functioning and Dane has Asperger's, a milder form. The Church's new website on Disabilities, disabilities.lds.org, summarizes as follows: “While persons with autism can't be identified by their physical appearance, they have similar attributes that can be observed. They usually have difficulties with language or communication, social skills, and behavior.” Sound familiar?

Because there is no defining outward marker for autism, until told, it can be interesting to see how people react to the boys. Dane upped the ante last year when he was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes.

The Church's website has lots of great information along with fantastic explanations. I encourage you to take a look.

My goal today is to share some insights, include some personal experiences, and teach doctrine. I am going to sample liberally from a 1991 talk by President Boyd K. Packer entitled “The Moving of the Water”, a talk I highly recommend.

DISABILITIES: WHAT AND WHY
Some teach that all suffering is somehow the direct result of sin. President Packer reinforced that this is a false doctrine. Recall what the Savior taught during his ministry. In the Gospel of John 9:1-3, we read:



“As Jesus passed by, he saw a man which was blind from his birth.
“And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents,
that he was born blind?
“Jesus answered, Neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.”
And then Christ healed the man.

It isn't always clear why disabilities occur. Elder Russell M. Nelson referenced the prophet Alma when he taught:


“For reasons usually unknown, some people are born with physical limitations. Specific parts of the body may be abnormal. Regulatory systems may be out of balance. And all of our bodies are subject to disease and death. Nevertheless,
the gift of a physical body is priceless. Without it, we cannot attain a fullness of joy. “Eventually the time will come when each 'spirit and … body shall be reunited again in … perfect form; both limb and joint shall be restored to its proper frame' (Alma 11:43). Then, thanks to the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we can become perfected in Him.”
(We Are Children of God,” Ensign, Nov. 1998, 86–87)

FOCUS ON THE ETERNAL
Note that Elder Nelson ultimately focused on the eternal, the restored, the perfected. Living daily with a challenge of this nature forces a parent to look to the future, an eternal future free from the bondage of an imperfect physical body. President Packer cited President Joseph Fielding Smith as he explained that


“all spirits while in the pre-existence were perfect in form, having all their faculties and mental powers unimpaired. … Deformities in body and mind are …
physical.” (Answers to Gospel Questions, comp. Joseph Fielding Smith, Jr., 5 vols., Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1979, 3:19.) President Packer continues, “Physical means “temporal”; temporal means “temporary.” Spirits which are beautiful and innocent may be temporally restrained by physical impediments. If healing does not come in mortal life, it will come thereafter. Just as the gorgeous monarch butterfly emerges from a chrysalis, so will spirits emerge.”

DEALING WITH TODAY
Despite our best efforts, we all lose focus of our eternal goal from time to time. It is normal to spotlight the “need to do” items. Dealing with a disability—especially one that can be publicly distracting—forces us to address issues differently than most.

In a 2009 article in the Salt Lake Tribune titled “Trial of Faith: Parents, Children with Autism, and Church” we found many kindred spirits, who shared insights into how families with autistic children try to adapt, and how we struggle at Church.

The mother of an autistic son said:


"We spend our lives trying to be invisible, the family nobody notices."

The article goes on:


Indeed, many parents of children with autism give up on public worship,
weary of the frustration and embarrassment, angry with the real or perceived judgment of others.

Showing up in public places (especially where there is an expectation of reverence or decorum) can be difficult; none of us wants to be embarrassed, but most of us have sufficient pride that shame comes anyway. It is not easy to worship, or to watch the discomfort of those around you (real or perceived), when your child is consistently (and perhaps incorrectably)inappropriate.

Brent Petersen, a psychiatrist and clinical director at the Pingree Center for Children with Autism and Stake President of the Salt Lake Butler West Stake says,


"I can't tell you how many parents have come to me and said, 'We stopped coming to church. People look at us, and it's just not worth it.”

President Petersen opines "That just should not be,"

Carol Ruddell, a member of the Roman Catholic Church's Salt Lake City Diocesan Commission for People with Disabilities, agrees. "[Church] should be the most inclusive, the most accommodating, the most accessible. That's what faith is about."
Cyndie and I are extremely grateful for the encouragement, acceptance and friendship we find in our ward. Those of you here in March of 2010 may recall what we dubbed The Longest Two Minutes in Church. As Tate was presented to the Ward to receive the Aaronic Priesthood and be ordained a deacon, things got interesting… among other antics, he decided to dismount the stand over the bulkhead rather than use the stairs, and landed on his backside. Neither parent was in a position to do anything about it, and we were mortified!

Some of the feedback we got included:




  • “Joseph Smith exited the stand like that all the time” from Jeremy Lowry.



  • Sandra Hill said, “I wanted to tell Alex (who was being presented to advance to the office of Teacher the same day) to do the same thing! Take the pressure off!”



  • Sam Ford told his mother: Mom, I really thought he was going to stick the landing.

And when Tate ran away from the Bishop waiving his Tithing envelope and yelling “It‟s my money! He can‟t have it!” Monica Ford put her arm around Cyndie and simply said, “I think we all feel like that sometimes.”

PROGNOSIS
One of the most powerful passages in all of scripture is found in Acts Chapter 3 when a crippled man asks alms of Peter and John, Apostles focused on their mission to testify of Christ. Peter asked the man to exercise faith by looking at them, it is recorded that the man did look:


“And he gave heed unto them, expecting to receive something of them.
“Then Peter said, Silver and gold have I none; but such as I have give I thee: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth rise up and walk.
“And he took him by the right hand, and lifted him up: and immediately his feet and ankle bones received strength.
“And he leaping up stood, and walked, and entered with them into the temple, walking, and leaping, and praising God.
“And all the people saw him walking and praising God:
“And they knew that it was he which sat for alms at the Beautiful gate of the temple: and they were filled with wonder and amazement at that which had happened unto him.
I'd be lying if I told you I didn't wish every day that this happened in my home. However, President Packer taught:


“The very purpose for which the world was created, and man introduced to
live upon it, requires that the laws of nature operate in cold disregard for human feelings. We must work out our salvation without expecting the laws of nature to be exempted for us. Natural law is, on rare occasions, suspended in a miracle. But mostly our handicapped, like the lame man at the pool of Bethesda, wait endlessly for the moving of the water."
When we come to this earth, the Lord makes us two outcome promises. Our faith can
give us peace in this life and our righteousness will allow us to live with him in the world to come.

President Packer reminds us that remedy will occur. He said, “That day of healing will come. Bodies which are deformed and minds that are warped will be made prefect.”

I know that the Resurrection is real. I look forward to that day when bodies, minds, and souls are healed and perfected.

In the meantime, it is my role to look after those in my stewardship who wait by the pool of Bethesda.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

OmaHeck: Learning from Your Kids

Last night, as we were winding down from the Halloween events, Tate told us that he never wanted 2010 to end.
He likes being 12, October is great, December is coming, it's his favortite time of the year.
Then he throws out that he likes numbers divisible by 3.

"Um, Tate," I say, "2010 is NOT divisible by 3." I'm so sure I'm right because in my trick-or-treated out head, 201 is not divisible by 3 and so neither is 2010. He starts to argue with me. But he's tired too, so he just goes to bed.

Cyndie was thinking, we probably shouldn't argue with Tate on this issue... it's proven to be frutiless--and embarrasing--in the past.

So today after church, Tate grabs the calculator and types in 2010, shows it to me, hits divide by and then 3... equals 670! He's right. OK, so maybe I'll be smarter next time. But probably not.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

OmaHeck: Heroes, Cyborgs and Dad

Cyndie was watching the news tonight when I got home tonight. As we served up dinner, but just before turning off the TV, Minute To Win It! came on. The contestants were disabled veterans who had both been shot in the leg by a missile. Each had a prosthetic leg. Dane was admiring their stories, fascinated.

He looked for a while, then said, "They are cyborgs!"

"Really?" responded his parents.

"Well they are part human... and part machine."

"Oh" from the parents.

"Dad's actually a cyborg, too. He's got that metal machine in his knee."

Cyndie's thinking this could hold braggin' rights at the local elementary milk cooler, so she asks him, "Have you told people about this?"

Dane retorted incredulously, "No, that would blow his cover!"

Maybe it's time for my secret identity to become my only identity.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

OmaHeck: Been a While

So you haven't heard from us recently, and that's not by design. Let's just say that antibiotics have become a family favorite recently.

Here are a couple of choice Dane-isms from recent weeks.

Cyndie stopped by the bank to deposit a check the other day. She put the check and deposit slip in the tube and Dane was mesmerized. "Oh!! Looks like some kind of DNA containment chamber--or a pod!"

A few days ago, while we were planning a pool trip, Dane got his idioms combined and let us know that "waiting for an hour to swim after you eat is Old Mothers' Folk!" When he realized that he'd combined Old Wives' Tale, Folk Tale, and Mothers' Tale, he roared with laughter. We all did.

I love having kids for the fun things they say...

Saturday, August 21, 2010

OmaHeck: How Did You Find Me?

Tate is officially in Jr High. For all the frantic worrying (by his mom, not so much by me, and especially not by Tate), day 1 went off without a hitch... mostly.

Day 1 is for 7th graders only. Get 'em in the school and herd 'em from class to class without the 8th and 9th graders owning the halls. Makes sense. We did a dry run at back to school night on Wednesday. Did you know that Jr High has a distinctive smell? It is a smell that says,"I haven't showered recently, but I used deodorant 2 days ago and it since I haven't showered, it should still be on." But I digress.

Tate spent 5th grade brooding about moving and spent 6th grade being done with elementary school. This summer he told me that he was looking forward to "a whole new life at Jr High." Music. Music to my ears!

We met with the teachers and the special ed coordinators. Everything was lined up. Schedule, locker (which did get changed once we realized where his classes were relative to his original locker), paper filing system, plan for the alphasmart, etc. etc. After lunch, the plan was for him to hit the media center and read. Grrreat! He doesn't really like sports or playground, so that's a fantastic solution. Until we execute...

After lunch, Tate headed straight to the media center for some reading time. He camped out behind the book fair display and got down to business. Shortly after opening Eyewitness books on snakes, skeletons, and sharks, the Librarian came by and said sweetly, "Well hello! What are you doing here?" Technically the media center wasn't open at lunch. Trouble brewing? Nope, Tate took it in stride and responded,, "How did you find me?"

Librarian called Special Ed instructor and said, "I think you have a lost soul down here." He offered Tate lunch access to his room and bookshelves and Tate was cool with the swap. Disaster averted. Thank goodness for small miracles.

While getting ready for bed, Tate offered up that he was thankful for a great 1st day of school. We're on our way!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

OmaHeck: Anybody Want a Peanut?

First off, if you recongized the title from its source in "The Princess Bride", +2 for you and a gold star to boot.

[pause for self congratulation... now on to the meat of the post]

If you buy salted-in-the-shell peanuts in bulk, you may want to stop, or at least reconsider your current venue.

In a fit of randomness, we learned the following recently:

Sitting at breakfast, Dane asked Cyndie, "Mom, are you supposed to eat the shells?"

"What shells, honey?"

"On the peanuts, are you supposed to eat them?"

"Well, no, but they do have lots of salt on them, don't they?"

"When there are peanuts out in a box at the store, I used to just grab some, suck the salt off, then put the peanuts back in the box."

Now, I can't prove this actually happened, nor can the alleged location be pegged. All we have is the mad ramblings of a diabetic 9-year-old.

But I did think you should know.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

OmaHeck: Tate's Take

Today's topic on Tate's Take: Trampolines...

1. We do a lot of tricks. Boing.
2. Dane tells me his dreams on the trampoline.
3. We play a lot of crazy things.
4. We play when each other isn't around.
5. We play on it after our homework.
6. We play on it after our big sized dinner.
7. We get hurt a lot on the trampoline.
8. We never fall off the trampoline.
9. We act like the nets are webs.
10. We are exersizeing on the trampoline.
11. We are monsters for each other.
12. We act like killers on the trampoline.
13. We are so big fans of the trampoline.
14. We act like fool like on AFV.
15. We play with water on hot days.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

OmaHeck: The Incident (of Dane, Deductibles, and DKA)

In his extremely odd song "Pancreas", Weird Al favors us with the following:
My pancreas is always there for me
Secreting those enzymes
Secreting those hormones too
Metabolizing carbohydrates just for me


OK, so what if it doesn't? Metabolize carbohydrates, I mean. Well, then you are Dane and you have Type 1 Diabetes. This news may come as a shock to some of you... we've told some as it has come up, but haven't reached out en mass, and we know that others are learning here for the first time. Hope the Weird Al reference softens the blow for you.

It was just a few days after my last blog post (which of course was intended to kick off some more frequent blogging) that we had our "incident." Here's how it went down:

Dane had been a little sick for a while. A cold. Some sniffles. Nothing too crazy. Maybe a virus we thought after a few days, because there was a bit of vomiting. But really, this family has seen kid sickness before.

The weekend got a little more intense, he was pretty lethargic and a little more of the "fun stuff."
By the time I got home from work Monday night (rather late, because I had an event with some customers that evening) Dane was in bad shape. While the vomiting had subsided, he was breathing very heavily. This is normal for D when he has a fever, but he didn't have a fever, so we were getting really concerned. After another trip to the bathroom where Dane was just too tired to walk out, so he just lay down on the floor. Well, he lay down if you call falling over and saying, "I'm just too tired to stand up" laying down. OK, now we knew something was up.

All along we hadn't seen evidence of Swine Flu (H1N1) or any other pandemic or such... we were at a loss.

Cyndie just looked at me and said, "You have to take him to the ER." So I did.

They did a History a quick once over and started in on their stuff. I didn't know what was going on.

Every once in a while they asked me a question.

Eventually, about 2 am they said "Diabetic Ketoacidosis." And I was totally confused. Dane doesn't have diabetes, I told myself. And good thing, because if there are 2 things this kid hates, it is shots and food. At that point the Doctor in charge told me that Dane needed to be transported to Primary Children's hospital because that is where they treat juveniles. And transport would be by ambulence. At this point I am pretty sure we have reached our insurance deductible for Dane. Turns out that Diabetic Ketoacidosis (DKA) is pretty serious stuff. You can read more about it here.

I followed the ambulance up to PCH. At this point I am really confused. Partially because I am bleary-eyed, and partly because I am still relatively sure that Dane does not have diabetes (this is what psychologists call "denial".)

About 2 more hours in the ER at PCH, then maybe 8 or so in Pediatric Intensive Care (PICU). After which Dane was transferred to the "floor" or the regular hospital with a confirmed diagnosis of Type 1 Diabetes where he stayed for the next 3 days. This kind of stay is totally normal with a new diagnosis of Diabetes.

This is already long, but I'll shorten the rest up a bit...

You spend 3 days at the hospital so the endocrinologist can monitor how you respond to insulin (and in Dane's case so we could get his blood sugar levels down from 500 to closer to 100 in a slow and controlled manner). Also, there is a substantial (read: overwhelming) amount of information you need and about every 90 minutes someone is coming in to teach you something: diet, exercise, pharmaceuticals, injections, insurance, support groups, clinics, supplies, etc. We didn't know quite how to respond to it all... compare this to when Tate was diagnosed with Autism and we were essentially told "Your son exhibits behaviors consistent with the Autistic spectrum. Good luck with that."

I'm sparing the emotional detail. Frankly, it's almost too exhausting to relive, even in pixels.

So where are we now?

  • Dane is testing blood glucose himself (sparingly) and doing his own injections (always) after Cyndie or I calculate the dosage and draw the insulin.
  • We generate much more garbage that we did before (mostly little plastic caps from the syringes, alcohol wipes, alcohol wipe packaging, blood glucose strips and packaged food (which lists the exact number of carbs included).
  • We live a more regimented life (Dane needs to eat regularly, and he's still in the honeymoon phase, where his pancreas regains some-though inconsistent-functionality before finally giving up for good).
  • We are extremely grateful to Heavenly Father who sustains us in all things, and for those locally who have helped us through to this point.
    Cyndie and I don't go out as much... still need to get him comfortable with dosing himself before we inflict him on a babysitter...
There's more, of course, but I'm getting too deep and that's not what I wanted for this post. It is a life changing event. That's an understatement of course. The change is more pronounced for us because just 72 hours before the "Incident" and diagnosis, Cyndie and I spent a couple hours with several old friends at a wedding reception. All those conversations would have been radically different if they'd have happened a week later.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

OmaHeck: The Longest 2 Minutes in Church

I'm quite confident that this was a first. Jeremy said there is a long and established (even distinguished1) precedent, but I am similarly confident that his offering was intended to provide perspective, not fact.


Tate was ordained a Deacon in the Aaronic Priesthood. And that part went quite well. He wore a white shirt. And a tie. A really nice tie2. We had discussed that Deacons are reverent and that Deacons tuck their shirts in. Also, they should probably keep their collars turned down. Bishop (kind, grandfatherly and easygoing) pointed this collar thing out in the interview3, referencing the picture of the First Presidency on the wall. Tate deftly pointed out that Joseph Smith wore his collar up. Bishop pulled the 6" bust of the Prophet Joseph from his credenza and was forced to admit Tate had him there4.


So for the rest of the week, and many, many times today, Tate was reminded that there were some keys to performance today: overt reverence, shirt tails tucked in, collar down. Especially while he was on the stand, next to the Bishop, being sustained by the members of the Ward.


Well, we almost got there. Here's a play by play of the day that will be remembered as long as neurons continue to fire in the Homestead Ward:


Bishop called Tate up to the stand. I absentmindedly closed the book Tate was looking at, so he had to open to the right page and mark it before he could leave the pew. Elapsed time: 7 seconds. (Whew!)


He hopped/bounced5 the 15 yards or so up to the stand. The last 5 yards also served to flip up his collar (several snickers-the vocal kind, not the candy kind). Elapsed time: 17 seconds.


After his flight up the stairs (3 of them) he paused, looked at the Bishop and untucked his shirt tails to many more audible laughs. Elapsed time: 20 seconds.


He stood quietly by the Bishop (on the Bishop's left, this will come to play in just a bit) while he was presented to be sustained. He did lean his head on the pulpit. Elapsed time: 40 seconds.


When he was asked to raise his hand to sustain himself, our sweet Bishop lifts Tate's right hand into the air. Right in front of the microphone. You see where I am going? Tate proceeded to tap his fingers on the microphone. So Bishop set Tate's hand down. Asks if any are opposed, gets no response and lets go of Tate's hand. At which point Tate raps his knuckles on the pulpit. Guess what? Our chapel has good acoustics! Tra La! Elapsed time: 1.25 minutes.


Cyndie and I look at each other and breathe a sigh that we've made it through this performance.


And then came the Encore! Really, there was an encore.


Tate walked about 3 steps away from the pulpit (still about 3 steps from the stairs), puts his hands on the banister, and proceeds to launch himself over the bulkhead and onto his backside on the floor. Elapsed time: 1.75 minutes.


Cyndie and I are mortified. At some point in Tate's effort, Bishop said, "No!" Then laughed and said, "Tate's a good kid.". There were more laughs. Fortunately, there were no horrified gasps, or judgmental ones either. Cyndie and I are mortified regardless.

And that was how our Sacrament meeting started.

So, thanks to Jeremy for his perspective. And thanks to Sandra, who wanted so much to tell Alex6 to take the pressure off Tate by doing exactly the same thing. If only she wasn't on the other side of the chapel at the time.

If the Kentucky Derby is "The Fastest Two Minutes in Sports", this was "The Longest Two Minutes in Church" and perhaps in my life.

____________________

1 "Joseph Smith exited the stand like that all the time."

2
One that Cyndie got at DI for $2. Not the one Gwimi bought retail, presented to him on his birthday and for her efforts was told, "Thank you... but you don't give clothes for a birthday, you give toys!" Gwimi and Grandpa have subsequently been offered
shopping privileges in Cyndie's closet.

3 In the interview, Tate also pointed out that the statue of the Christus looked like Plato. Bishop concurred. He's learning not to argue facts with Tate.

4

5 If you've seen him walk, you know.


6 RS Prez Sandra's son Alex was presented to be advanced to the office Teacher today. He was on the right side of the chapel preparing to pass the Sacrament. She was on the far left with her Husband. She told Cyndie, "It was great to see him up there today." Cyndie rolls eyes. Sandra empathetically says, "No, it really was great." Cyndie confesses that she doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. Sandra says to laugh. "I wanted to tell Alex, 'Go do the exact same thing. Do it just like he did. Take the pressure off!'"

Friday, January 22, 2010

OmaHeck: Sled Your Pants Off!

Thirty degrees and sunny with 6" of fluffy, white powder. What are 3 red-blooded American men to do? Hit the city park, dang-it!

By the time we took care of chores and got our gear together, the sun was casting some sideways shadows, but the clear skies helped keep the hillside warm.

Adventurer (and complusive water finder) that he is, Tate found some really great views of the creek, a bridge and trees freshly adorned.



At some point, he took a walk on the "frozen" part of the creek. Oh, so that's how he got so wet. Don't tell Mom!


What goes up...
must inevitably come down, and that's the really fun part of sledding!
"Hey, Dad, that looks like ice. I bet we could slide down without a sled, right on our snow pants."


"Hey guys, if you slide on your snow pants, you might wear them out too fast, and bump your bum in the process."

OmaHeck: Hoops and Heights

We're fortunate to get to see some good hoops here in Utah. BYU's team has been especially good so far (we'll see what happens come March, but for now there are no eyes on this horse's mouth). My company has season tickets to the Utah Jazz as well. These come with a few bonus events, like an autograph night where you can bring an item and stand in line for your favorite Jazz players, coaches and mascots to sign. We thought Dane would be all over it, but he went chicken and wouldn't have anything to do with the players. Tate, on the other hand, was all over it after he saw the Dippin' Dots stand (unfortunately idled for the evening).

Tate can't believe his eyes (is that why they are closed?) He's about to get an autograph from Bear (and Andrei Kirilenko, who pales in comparison).

My favorite Jazz Fans:


If you ask Tate, the best autographs were from the Jazz Dancers :-). They were signing posters with all of the dancers in action. In his most polite manner, Tate approached their table, offered his Jazz calendar, told them "No thank you" when they offered him a poster, and said, "Sign this, and have a good day." The gal misunderstood, so she winked at Tate and said, "How 'bout I sign it 'Have a GREAT day?'" Tate blushed...


Recently, we all hit the Marriott Center for a BYU vs Colorado State basketball game. It was family day, so there were about 15,000 kids there (no joke, it was overly kid-ish, even for Utah County). We only decided to go the game that same morning, and didn't want to pay a service fee for tickets online. So by the time we arrived, pickings were slim. We ended up on the top row (but in chairs). It was a great view, and we had a good time. Adding to the fun was an old-fashioned romp! BYU won 91-47.


I kind of forgot that I had the camera until the game was over, but since we let the crowd clear out before we left, I was able to snap some pics... but there was no one left to take a shot of all of us together.

My favorite Cougar fans:


OmaHeck: Tate's Take

Here's another edition of our new column: Tate's Take. Today's entry comes from an email he sent home during school:

Mrs. Brown said I was goofy because I did things that changed the subject. I
learned that Pez were first used for adults and after their creation they were
used by children.

I found out that barracudas and sharks love shiny
things. Mrs. Brown once got chased by barracudas because she wore shiny
earrings.

I went ice skating today and didn’t get hurt at all. Mrs.
Brown was my partner for a while, but I didn’t need her help at all after a
while. I love ice skating!

... and that's Tate's Take

Friday, January 1, 2010

OmaHeck: Disney Vacation

Would you believe years of planning? Even years of saving? With the deals Walt and Co. were offering, it was clear our time had come. Kids are 11 and 8, so we couldn't ask for a sweeter spot to hit.

What follows is a sampling of our trip, with a little commentary. The pics loaded in reverse order, something I knew, but didn't think aobut until htey were all loaded, and I don't have the patience to move them around. So forgive the stream of consciousness, William Faulkner would be proud.

The weather presented a couple of interesting opportunities. The first few days were overcast, and then rainy... we are the proud owners of 4 Magic Kingdom ponchos (screaming deals notwithstanding, those were a bit pricey!)

We didn't really need the ponchos more than a bit, and the drizzle we were willing to endure kept both the crowds and temperatures down. By our last day, the clouds cleared and we saw Sunny California and 82 degrees. Fortunately, we can really carry off the "I'm sweaty" look while eating frozen lemonade:

Indiana Jones was one of the first rides we hit (and we hit it several times). The first go-round was a little nerve-wracking for our spawn, but they rose to the challenge, and were mighty archeological adventurers.
Long about the end of September The Haunted Mansion and a few other rides get decked out for the season. Jack Skellington and friends from "The Nightmare Before Christmas" come to town.
Never shying away from a fight (or a Star Wars opportunity), we hit the Jedi Training School. Neither of our Padowan were chosen for the academy, and parents got nervous as we saw one small friends get a bit angry. However, the anger passed as a flock of Jedi and Sith hit the stage.

We got some close-up with the Sith in the Lego shop.
It took us until Day 4 to find our way to the "Small World". Ironically (or maybe not), after we left the Small World ride, we ran into someone we knew for the first time! It is a small world, after all!
And speaking of Small World, our fellow BYU fans really represented. My sampling wasn't random, I only saw you if you were where I was while I was there. That said, after local fans (Angels, USC, and maybe the Dodgers), the biggest fandom was probaby the BYU Cougar Nation. The Y fans were easily on par with USC, Arizona schools and teams, and maybe even the Dodgers.
We saw an entire family in various forms of Cougar gear. Cyndie says to me, "Is something going on? Why are they all dressed like that?" We have very different views of fandom, she and I.
Our Disney package included a couple of Character Breakfasts. We were able to eat with both Chip & Dale, and Lilo & Stich. What a blast!

Look, Ma! No hands!!!

Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.
On the set at California Adventure.
Look, if we don't help Buzz Lightyear save the universe, who will?
Emporer Zurg, you better watch out!
The Dumbo ride was a surprising success. Tate and I learned a bit about centrifugal forces work: SQUISH!

Here's breakfast with Lilo and Stitch. They taught us to dance, and hung out with us for a while...
... celebrating our 15th Anniversary!

Pluto also stopped by to congratulate Cyndie on putting up with me for 15 years :^P
Stich was jealous. He likes Cyndie! Notice the duck doll in the photo. Wingnut is the mascot of Tate's 6th grade class. He goes on trips with class members, and they make a book of his wild and crazy adventures.
626 hitting on my 10.

Look Dad, Dumbo the Elephant made from a bush!
Boys playing with Teacups... this is as close as this crowd gets to a tea party!Getting ready for the Matterhorn. Will we see the Yeti?
Wingnut and Tate at the Magic Kingdom!
OK and here are the last photos of the trip. Work with me here. Take a look at Cyndie and tell me what fictional chocolatier she reminds you of?
Put a top hat on her, and maybe you'll get the picture... if not simply scroll down.